пустынь - The Poustinia

When I had the absolute amazing privilege of going on retreat (which happened to be my first retreat) in the wilds of Northumbria, these were the best things:

1) Being made a special apple pudding because I couldn't eat the one everyone else was having.

2) Being MADE A CUP OF TEA by a complete stranger, just because, when we were living in community; and

3) The Poustinia.

One of the Madonna House poustinias

(I may have missed out lots of spiritual stuff, but honestly, these are the things at the forefront of my mind as I type!)

Obviously it wasn't a proper Poustinia, but I had an amazing couple of reflective, contemplative spiritual experiences nevertheless, sat in blankets in a cold garden overlooking the beauty of fields.

It was an extra wonderful space to spend time with God, within a new monastic community that was already a wonderful space to spend time with God. And it led me to research on the desert fathers and the authentic Poustinia tradition, to place the whole experience in context.

The Poustinia is a tradition drawn from the Desert Fathers and Mothers, and for those of you who don't know about them, a quick recap. Unsurprisingly, we are talking about a tradition of wandering off by ourselves, meeting with God in contemplation in solitude, and all of those other things as a mother I have got a hope in hell of experiencing (or so I thought before I discovered retreat houses!)

The original Desert Fathers can be found in the Egyptian desert during the 3rd Century AD, perhaps the most famous of whom is now known as St Anthony the Great. As an introvert I can completely empathise with them withdrawing from life and the material world to be by themselves and pray! Over time monastic communities emerged and whenever I think of these I think of what we do in our church, local and mission communities. Men and women lived in these communities; pilgrims visited.

Without the Desert Fathers and Mothers, we wouldn't have monasticism as we know it.

Their ascetic, prayerful, pastoral tradition travelled to the Eastern Orthodox Church, as well as influencing the Benedictines and other western monastic settings.

And so to the Poustinia, which is a Russian word meaning - wait for it - desert! (Although it encompasses a dual meaning, of course, because you can find or make a lonely, empty place anywhere.) Modelled after the retreat houses of the Desert Fathers and Mothers, the Russian Orthodox Church established the practice of small huts where clergy or other spiritually minded persons could withdraw, preferably for twenty-four hours to medidate, contemplate and join with God. (Not that I managed twenty-four hours, but....it was cold, so very slightly after the Russian model!) Without an actual physical desert, one can still practice these elements, as Doherty's 1975 book 'Poustinia: Christian Spirituality of the East for Western Man' suggests:

"an entry into the desert, a lonely place, a silent place, where one can lift the two arms of prayer and penance to God in antonement, intercession, reparation for one's sins and those of one's brothers.... To go into the poustinia means to listen to God. It means entering into kenosis — the emptying of oneself."

There are poustinias all over the world. Madonna House community in the USA, founded by Catherine Doherty, has a whole lot of them; I had never experienced one before I went on retreat.

Inside a Madonna House poustinia

And so we come back to a little wooden hut, in a new monastic community in the very north of England. Surrounded by plants, fruit and vegetables grown by people who lived and visited there. Not far away from an outdoor chapel. The hut contained a couple of chairs, blankets, a Bible, a cross, candles and matches in a tin to keep them dry from the damp air. I visited in winter so it was chilly outside and cold within, but I snuggled in a blanket and had some much-needed time in conversation with God, often silent, often listening. How fitting that the Northumbria Community, providing sanctuary, silence, retreat and respite for its visitors, continues a tradition from those Desert Fathers of centuries ago.

(NB - I spent the first draft of this talking about a Pushkinya! And while Pushkin is definitely also Russian, it is not the same thing at all. Just, ahem, keeping it real!)

7 Quick Takes: The Michaelmas (or I love Autumn) Edition!

1: Michaelmas

I'm very excited because it's been Michaelmas this week. It is only recently after all that I discovered its full meaning and that it gives me an excuse to put blackberries and orchard fruits into a cake or pie. And squash and pumpkin are in season! And spiced pumpkin lattes! (not that I have had one yet.) Coupled with the fact that I missed the first few weeks of 'back to school' due to surgery is the exciting feeling I get with Autumn mists in the air, seasonal foods to cook with and Harvest Supper approaching! I was lucky enough to attend a Holy Communion service on the feast of St Michael & the Archangels itself, and share coffee and a Belgian bun at home with a new friend afterwards. I was wiped out, mentally and physically, afterwards, but it was worth the effort. Our priest has been on a missional trip in India, I didn't want to trouble the curate to minister the Eucharist to me at home again, so even though I sat down for everything but the Gospel reading & the Creed, receiving the Lord's Supper on that special day was amazing!!! (And so was the Belgian bun. Ahem.) (Edited to add - later in the week, another friend came round with Belgian buns. How blessed am I?!)

2: Link-tober

I am also extra excited because when I visited the hosting site for 7 Quick Takes today, I found out it is anniversary time! (I will stop the exclamations at some point. Promise.) Can you believe it, 7 Quick Takes has been going for 7 years. How special is that? Kelly is running a special Link-tober fest with a competition and everything, and encouraging those of you who haven't posted for a while to post. Before I was at Strength and Song, I blogged at Musings on Motherhood and Ministry and posted my first Quick Take approximately five years ago. Coupled with the Autumn-ness of everything I've gone all reflective and spent half an hour looking back to this time in 2010. (You can tell no children are home.) It will have to be a whole other post though. Definitely not a Quick Take (although I don't think mine have ever been very quick!) 

3: All about that squash (and pumpkin!)

Squash soup (in shadow)

I am purposefully making my blog posts more about food, but believe me it's also just ON MY MIND. Partly it's because it took me a while post-surgery to get back into eating, preparing and enjoying food again. But it's also due to me trying to cut out the processed stuff and eat foods that make me feel well, and make me well. Last week I baked rye bread, made squash soup from bone broth and had berries from the freezer with plain yogurt. Although I missed out on brambling in our amazing English countryside, blackberries are going to be delivered today, so I will finally be making my Michaelmas cake - which this year is likely going to take the form of a pear and blackberry crumble, possibly made with maple syrup and oats instead of a traditional wheat flour and sugar topping. Nom nom! The connection between food and spirituality becomes so wonderfully and increasingly evident on so many levels the more I delve into it. Thankfully (and even the name of blog is to do with Michaelmas!) Haley, amongst others, has a fabulous blog which provides a wealth of ideas of what to put on the table. It's a great way to connect with the liturgical calendar, as was Bonnie's recent post on Living Liturgically in October. Oh, and, by the way, instead of faffing around trying to make a proper USA pumpkin pie from scratch, I found out that the new supermarket  I use imports Libby's pumpkin puree, so we even get a proper shot at Thanksgiving. (NB - I aware that Thanksgiving is Not a Liturgical Festival. As such. As far as I know.)

It's not Libby's. It's MINE.

4: Harvest

I am (unsurprisingly given my current food obsession) looking forward to our imminent fish and chip supper at Harvest Festival, not least because I have been out of the church loop for almost a month now and I miss the fellowship. This week I lovingly prepared apples, cinnamon and sugar and topped them with crumble.

I feel like The Pioneer Woman now.

Some of them had fallen from my mother in law's apple tree. They are not the only windfalls I have been blessed with. As well as being held in prayer recently I may have kept visitors to a minimum but cards were very much appreciated and a few people gave me flowers. I'm so very thankful. (The ones below just shout "autumn" at me!)

5: Christmas (ahem)

Having said that I am loving Autumn, let's fast forward to Christmas temporarily. (Yes, really!) (Sorry!) There is a photo doing the rounds on Facebook that a few people have liked, featuring a Christmas gift box of pyjamas and other bits and bobs. Very cute. But, bang on-trend as I so frequently am (not), for once I am thankful to have been doing Christmas pyjamas as a tradition for a few years now - and that I have purchased this year's onesies! Because I've been putting money aside throughout the year we have also stretched to buying robes for them. And all have been washed in the special anti-allergy washing liquid we use for the kids and been line dried and boxed away for Christmas Eve. WIN.

4 onesies & 4 robes for 4 Sisters

6: More Christmas (kill me now)

Oh, and did I mention this?! I won't be participating in our choir Christmas concert this year, as I've missed (and will continue to miss) too many rehearsals to do the pieces justice. But I will be singing Christmas carols with choir in the local community as often as I can. And my friend dropped round my new book after she had been to choir rehearsal on Wednesday. (And also - it's time for me to make my Christmas cake....sssssh.....)

7: Autumn

OK, OK, I know it's not time for Christmas. Because it has been Michaelmas, did I mention? It is Autumn. FirstSister turned eleven yesterday. It is Nottingham Goose Fair weekend. And for dinner last night we had (organic gluten-free but I wouldn't recommend them) pork sausages with mashed potato and red cabbage braised with red wine vinegar, orange juice, orange zest, ground allspice, sliced apple and finely chopped ginger. AUTUMN. BRING IT ON. (Did I mention pumpkin spiced lattes....?)

Red cabbage. PRETTY.

Write and post your own 7 Quick Takes and reminisce over the past 7 years of posts over at This Ain't the Lyceum.

The Chaplaincy

As some of you know, I volunteer in a Chaplaincy at a local hospital. Technically, it's actually called the Department of Spiritual and Pastoral Care and as there are other things about it that aren't always known, I thought I would write a little about one of the settings I work in and what I do.

In short, of course, I work for God. He called me to this ministry, and it's a form of service where I help others but am also energised as a person and fed spiritually, not least because the team share ecumenical prayer at 9.30am every week before going to volunteer on the wards. At least one writer (possibly in the pastoral care or chaplaincy field, I can't believe I can't remember1) may have mentioned this, but as we move out to visit patients after this time of prayer, we are continuing our worship of God in another form; it has a beautiful continuity that I also try to practice at home, following (particularly Benedictine and Carmelite) monastic traditions. Our life in service to Him, as a prayer to God.

Practically, as well, volunteering in a ward visitor team offers fellowship and opportunities for personal, social and intellectual growth. Two wonderful women volunteers have encouraged us all, staff and volunteers, to meet for a monthly breakfast in the hospital restaurant which has helped us develop as a team. Our employers run regular reflective practice sessions as well as induction and follow up training sessions. And did I mention we pray together???!

So what does the Chaplaincy do? Ultimately, it provides an aspect of healthcare for patients at the hospital. We are believers in HOLISTIC care - this focuses on healing the whole person, not just physical symptoms - mentally, emotionally, spiritually, people need support to get well, too. There is always a Chaplain on twenty-four hour call to deal with whatever needs dealing with - a person close to death, a problem in neonatal, a member of hospital staff who needs to talk. Traditionally, nurses would fulfil at least part of this role, but in our National Health Service (NHS) in the UK today, it is recognised that paid ward staff have enough to do without having extra capacity to talk to patients - which is depressing, but, in my experience, true.And they aren't just for people of faith - Chaplains are there to listen to anybody who feel they would benefit.

However, the faith aspect is very important to the people who work there and many of the people we listen and talk to. By its very nature, being ill and/or experiencing suffering can cause people to reach out to God, reject Him, or just need some comfort through prayer. As well as the Chaplains employed at my place of work, there are, thankfully, lots of volunteers. Every time I walk into the hospital to work I am reminded of the extreme need there is for this type of work. The NHS regularly assesses whether it should sustain this type of ministry in its hospitals and it literally breaks my heart that closing the Department could one day happen.

As well as providing prayer and a listening ear, the Chaplaincy enables worship too. Regular Holy Communion services are held and the EUcharist can also be ministered at the bedside. Our Department of Spiritual and Pastoral Care is not wholly a Church concern. Various Christian denominations are represented including Free Church, Roman Catholic and Church of England. As well as the Christian ecumenical focus, we serve the hospital as a Multi-Faith Chaplaincy. In addition to a Chapel on site, there is a Mosque, Gurdwara and Mandir.  There is a higher percentage of Christian volunteers, but also of different faiths. Jewish, Hindu, Sikh and Muslim Chaplains are also available to minister to patients as well as the Christian core (trying to reflect the population admitted to the hospital).

Personally I work on children's wards, offering a service tailored to children and young people, their parents and carers. People have said to me this must be very difficult - and so it is. It is not easy to see such suffering and know that there is a lack of hope for the families involved. However, it reminds me time after time that hospital is not where you go to die, it is a place of healing, and in the majority of cases, people get well and get discharged. Additionally, the amount of sheer joy, energy and enthusiasm generated by children suffering from the most terrible of illnesses is evident on a daily basis. God is good.

So that's it, in a nutshell! It sums up what the Chaplaincy does, and I am so thankful that I can play my minor role within it, visiting patients for an hour or two every week. I regularly rejoice that God reminded me that the hospital was a place in need of me when he called me, and transformed my attitude towards the sick and the dying. What else might he be calling you to volunteer to do, that you had never considered as an earthly possibility?