It's a girl!

Well OBVIOUSLY, after blogging about how the caesarean was due, I would go and go into labour beforehand wouldn't I? Luckily it worked out well - I was labouring for a long time, so another 24 hours+ experience like with my first cbild (Sophie.) But despite attempts to push Sophie out (including more than a little help from forceps) she remained stubbornly positioned and I had my first caesarean. Second time around (Imogen) and I didn't fancy going through all that again. Four years later (Rebecca Mary Standen Croasdale) I obviously had no memory of what it's like to struggle to get fully dilated to 10 cm even with the aid of gas & air, so had another go - and this time (ventouse and episiotomy notwithstanding) did get there without medical intervntion. And not an awful lot of pain relief. Ouch.

She's here, anyway, and she's beautiful, and after delivery she was home with us all 15 hours later which was fantastic (and the main reason I wanted to labour 'naturally' to be honest.) Her big sisters love her even though she has done little but feed and sleep. She appears to be adjusting well to my attempts to get her on a bit more of a routine. I am so thankful for the help of my husband in dealing with this when I already have 2 little girls who need entertaining! And Thank God for being amazingly blessed with our wonderful family.

The final stage....

Well, this is it folks! Soon we'll have Baby No 3 (possibly a Rebecca, or an Edward, and no the boy's name is not inspired by Twilight....) I think I'm starting to panic, as although the old cervix appears to be ripening and I am doing mad bastard things like sticking on new wallpaper borders and washing children's shoes with fabric shampoo, I'm certainly not prepared for delivery on Thursday.

Yes, Thursday! Best case scenario - we are the only ones booked in for C-Section on that day, there are no emergencies, and I am in theatre in the morning. Worst case - we are one of 4 booked in, and there are emergencies, and we will have to wait (on nil by mouth - thousands of apologies in advance, Dear Husband, if this makes me - additionally - moody.) And although I have this big faith, I still have anxiety - mainly because despite having 2 previous C-sections, they weren't planned in quite the same way as this one, and I just had to go with it, rather than having some semblance of structure but not being sure about the details.

Also, I'm trying to put in the back of mind thoughts about what happens if everything should go horribly wrong, as I have the best husband/friend/partner & 2 wonderful little girls at home - I just keep reminding myself that this is actually a routine operation these days. It's kind of like my fear of flying though - I'll be praying, and I know lots of other people are praying, for safe delivery - but I'm having to completely relinquish control and rely on the blessed surgeon and other health professionals who are helping out God bring new life into the world. So I'll be praying for them too! There'd be no guarantee that things would be any less worrying if a vaginal delivery was on the cards (in fact, knowing me, they'd be far more problematic)*, but I still can't quite get my head round the knowledge that we're going in on Thursday and baby will finally be with us!

It's not been an arduous pregnancy - my husband may differ on this, as he's been the one picking up the pieces while I was full of vomit, & struggling with pelvic pain - but I am ready for it to come to and end and meet the newbie. Obviously not looking to post-op recovery and lack of sleep and trying to get feeding sorted and so on - and my family are the best helpers in the world, but they may need entertaining with other stuff before long :-) But, we'll get there. See you on the other side!

*just watch me kick off into active labour this afternoon, that'll teach me!

Have We Become Too Casual? Why I Dress My Kids Up for Church

Have We Become Too Casual? Why I Dress My Kids Up for Church